


winter fire

by jeyjeyjetplane



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: F/M, First Crush, First Love, Hogwarts, James Potter is a sap, Marauders' Era, Romantic Fluff
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-06-11
Updated: 2018-06-11
Packaged: 2019-05-21 03:57:27
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,736
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14907878
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/jeyjeyjetplane/pseuds/jeyjeyjetplane
Summary: James Potter loves Lily Evans. Has since he was eleven.





	winter fire

**Author's Note:**

> To the lovely @inakindofdaydream, my magnificent angel of a best friend. Happy birthday. 
> 
> Shout out to Stephen King for giving me the OG eleven year old nerd in love with a fiery redhead at first sight. Please dont sue me.

_your hair is winter fire_  
_january embers  
my heart burns there too _

 

James was woken up by something hitting him in the face, right between the eyes. He twitched, blinking a few times as the mid-afternoon sun filtered into his dorm room, blindly grabbing for his glasses so he could see what was hitting him repeatedly.

It was a ball of parchment.

He looked up, confused as to what was happening. _Who the hell...?_

Lily Evans sat cross-legged on Remus’s bed beside him, staring at James expectantly. Her wand was out, and she was twitching it lightly in her fingers, making the paper hit him repeatedly.

“Oh good, you’re up.” She shifted briefly, untucking her legs to hang off the bed, kicking them lightly as she waited for her boyfriend to wake up fully.

“Lily, love, as much as I appreciate you, I really need to sleep,” James said, rolling over and pressing his face back into the pillow, glasses folded in one of his hands. The parchment continued to hit him consistently on the back of the head; Lily was working up a rhythm.

“Lily, please, I need sleep.”

“James,” she said, unrelenting with the paper. “It snowed.”

He sat up, looking at her briefly. The comforter fell to his waist, revealing his shirtless torso. Lily eyed him appreciatively for a moment as he levelled an annoyed gaze at her. “It’s been snowing for three days.”

“I know. But it stopped! I wanna go outside but Marlene and Dorcas are too busy doing weird couples things and Mary is studying - and on a Friday! Even I’m not that swotty! - so I need you to come with me. Please.”

James groaned, throwing himself back against his pillows. He was exhausted, even more so than he usually was after a full moon. The blizzard the night before had caused him to have trouble, even in his stag-form, keeping track of the the little pack he and his friend’s had formed. He has stumbled back up to the dormitory at five that morning, sweating despite the bitter cold, and painfully tired. He had barely enough time to strip down to his pants before burying himself beneath his covers.

Lily got up, finally letting the ball of parchment drop, and walked across the room to push the curtains open even wider. The sun was reflecting off the fresh, late-February blanket of snow, making the entire room a sickly white color. Satisfied, she sat herself on the bed beside him, carding her fingers through his hair until he opened his eyes again to look at her.

“Please, James. Come play outside with me.” Her green eyes were earnest, shining, and he had to turn away again before he answered in order to not give in immediately.

“After dinner, love. Nap with me until then?” She let out an indignant scoff but allowed herself to be pulled into his arms, untangling herself briefly to pull the covers around her.

“Oh thank god, finally! Now shut the fuck up!” Sirius shouted from beneath his own blankets. The parchment ball picked itself up from the bed beside James and started to bounce off of Sirius’s buried body rapidly. Sirius growled, throwing himself out of bed.

“I’ll just go see Moony, then,” he said, annoyed. “Menace.” He shot a look at Lily, who batted her eyelashes at him innocently. James chuckled, and pulled her closer. _Wow, I'm so stupidly lucky_. He promptly fell asleep with his nose pressed into her hair, content.

  


James stayed true to his word, and, after some gentle nudges to eat faster, he found himself being pulled by the hand out the door of the Entrance Hall and down the castle steps to the wide, sloping lawn. The snow was glittering in the light of the lanterns by the door, bathing the entire scene in an orange glow. James rubbed his eyes as he followed Lily, bouncing excitedly in her cream-colored hat and scarf, down the path leading to Hogsmeade a little, and away from the immediate proximity of the castle. Her gloved hand squeezed his tightly as she tripped and slid her way through icy snow. Once she found a spot that seemed to satisfy her, she released his hand and all but threw herself into the lawn, laughing as she tumbled through the snow. He watched her, awe-struck, as she stumbled around.

Before he knew it, snow hit him full in the face.

“Oi! Evans! What was that for?”

There were two second years a few yards from them, building a snowman from the looks of it. They turned fully toward the Gryffindors, unabashedly watching as they began to throw snow at each other. Lily quickly started to use her wand to lob bigger and bigger snowballs at James, and then all hell broke loose. Eventually, the snow-fight turned more into a playful duel, James and Lily slashing and flinging their wands, Charming snow to hit each other in increasingly ridiculous ways, laughing the whole time. The two underclassmen had lasted about ten minutes before they became casualties traipsed through the snow and back toward the warmth of Hogwarts and away from the two seventh years, cackling like children and covered in snow.

It took about twenty more minutes of this before Lily was laughing so hard that she tumbled into the snow, rolling around a little before settling with a contented sigh.

James watched as she lay there, surrounded by the crisp white, a startling contrast to her grey coat and black boots. It was James’s turn to laugh as she started to frantically wave her arms and legs about, pushing the snow around.

“Need some help, love?” She turned to him, big green eyes sparkling, and continued her movements, even faster this time.

“Not yet!” she shouted as he carefully picked his way across the snow to help her up. “I’m not finished yet!”

“Err, not finished doing what, exactly?”

“Making a snow angel. Obviously.”

“A snow angel?”

“Yes, you numpty! You’ll see,” she said said, slowing her mad movement. James looked at her skeptically, trying to figure out what the hell she was on about. _She looks like shes having an attack._

After a moment, she just laid there in the snow, red hair a crimson halo around her head, and watched the sky. They were far enough from the castle that the main source of light was the mostly-full moon, reflecting off the snow. The red of her hair was a sharp contrast to the white, emphasizing the paleness of her flushed, exposed cheeks. Her scarf was coming undone a little, revealing a bit of the smooth white of her long neck. Her lips were parted, a deep red from her lipstick combined with the cold, and she was panting a little. James watched as she shut her eyes, makeup-covered lashes brushing her cheekbones softly. She turned her head back to him, opening her eyes and smiling brightly. James’ breath caught in his throat, and he slowly started to walk forward. She was like a siren calling him, and before he knew it, he was kneeling beside her in the deep snow, shifting to lay beside her. Her hand found his immediately, and he smiled at her. She turned back to the sky, and he followed suit.

The winter night was quiet, and they were far enough from the castle that the stars were all easily visible. The sudden silence settled around them, comfortable as they watched the stars. For a moment, James felt as if he could feel the world turning as they wrapped themselves in the stillness of the evening, something that he had thought many times while in stag-form. He turned to tell Lily this, and was caught up again in the loveliness of her form, studying it, drinking it in.

It was amazing, he thought, that they could sit here, completely content in each other’s company. That, despite the biting wind and frozen ground beneath them; despite the endless bickering and bitter disagreements of their childhood; despite the boiling blood and icy hate that existed outside of the castle grounds, that the two of them could exist perfectly in this moment and James could not feel anything but the overwhelming urge to remain there, still in the silence.

_It's because I love her._

He had said the words before. Not loudly, and certainly not where anyone could have heard him - and certainly not to her - but they had been sitting in his brain for years, a silent affirmation of his deepest feelings. He would whisper them to himself at night after talking to her until the wee hours, or murmur them under his breath after she smiled at him in the halls. He had known he loved her for almost as long as he had known her, since she was a too-tall, overwhelmingly bright light of an eleven-year-old who would smile at everyone, even the Slytherins that whispered about her. He was sure she was the prettiest person he had ever seen, and his stomach swooped every time he spoke with her, stuttering out a response and entranced by the mischief in her eyes and the soft look of her skin.

He remembers watching her, just as he is now, lay by the lake with her friends on warm days, chatting with bright eyes. Just like now, her hair would be a blanket beneath her, too bright and lovely for comparison. The sun would drench her pale skin, and she would always be a little red the next day, but she would glow in its rays, and his heart would soar.

It was a day like that, in late May, that he first thought those words to himself, a smile stretching his cheeks impossibly wide. _I love Lily Evans_. He had to press his face to the grass to cool it down for a moment, stuttering out a weak explanation to Sirius as he watched him. Sirius shrugged and turned back to Remus, ignoring James as he pressed his hands to his cheeks, trying to calm himself down.

The feeling stuck with him through the years as they grew together, teasing each other in class and the common room, until he somehow found himself as her friend. It astonished him how amazing she really was, with her short skirts and cheeky remarks and effortless intelligence. He basked in her attentions for years, holding on to that realization of love that occured when he was eleven, knowing he would always remain as devoted to her as he was then, even if it took her a little longer to realize it.

First-year James would never have imagined that the fiery, incredible redhead of his dreams would be lying beside him in the snow, holding his hand. Hell, seventh-year James could barely believe it; could barely believe that he was dating her, able to hold her and kiss her whenever he wanted. She was so much better than any dream he had ever had, more amazing with every day.

“Lily,” he started. She turned to look at him, smile soft, eyes expectant. After a moment of silence, he leaned up and over and kissed her, mostly because he could. Her smile grew as she kissed him back, pressing her lips earnestly against his and winding her gloved hands briefly into her wet hair. He pulled away, looking down at her. Her lips had reddened even more, and her eyes were radiant and intense, staring directly into his expectantly.

_This is it, James. Say it._

He chickened out. “Thanks for dragging me out here.” _Oh, James, you absolute idiot._

Her eyes dulled slightly and she let out a breathy laugh. “My pleasure, darling.” He rolled away, laying back down beside her. “Even if you did ruin my snow angel.”

“You’re a snow angel.” She rolled her eyes, mumbling a little. He continued. “You were born in the right season, love. The snow suits you.”

“Oh. Well, thank you, James.”

“My pleasure, darling,” he said, smile evident in his voice. He brought her hand to his mouth, pressing a small kiss there. He knew he had missed his moment, kicking himself _Stupid James, just tell her!_ The silence surrounded them again, and after a moment, she sighed, pushing herself up to a sitting position. James followed her lead, and allowed her to pull him up and back through the snow to the path. This time, they walked much slower, hands swinging between them, no urgency to go back to the castle. Lily was shivering slightly, and tucked herself into his side, urging him to wrap his arm around her shoulder and pull her tighter into his side. He gladly did so, dropping a kiss to her forehead. She smiled into his shoulder.

The door to the castle was slightly ajar, and they pushed forward, laughing as their clothes dripped all over the great stone floor of the Entrance Hall. It was just gone nine, meaning they were late for curfew. Lily went to rush back to Gryffindor Tower, speaking rapidly about missing curfew and neglecting their duties as Head Students, but James held her back. He was still annoyed with himself for not telling her when he had a chance, for wasting his moment. “Wait a moment, Lily.”

She turned back to him, curious. “What’s up, James?”

He gathered himself up, straightening his spine to his full height, a mere six inches taller than her. She shifted from one foot to another, uncomfortable under his gaze. He must have looked ridiculous, staring at her intensely.

“Okay, so I have to say something, and you have to promise not to freak out. I don’t expect a specific answer, I just think you need to know. Because you’re wonderful, and I’m happy, and you deserve to know the truth.” He took a deep breath, and she raised her eyebrows at him, tilting her head. “Lily Evans, I love you.” _Oh shit._

She looked at him, letting out a chuckle, and walking back to his side. She stood right in front of him, minimal space between them, and James looked down at her, nervous.

“Oh James, I love you too. You absolute idiot.” She threw herself into his arms, kissing him thoroughly. He kissed back after a moment with enthusiasm _because Lily Evans! Loves me!_ When she finally pulled away, he had lifted her off the ground easily. He smiled up at her, spinning them around once with a shout. She tossed her head back and laughed, holding onto his shoulders for dear life then wiggling out of his grip.

“Hey, Lily, I love you.”

“Took you long enough, huh?”

“Long enough?”

“Yeah, you’re like three months behind schedule. Mary had you down for November.” He smiled at her, shaking his head. _If only she knew it was more like six years ahead._

“Yeah, sorry about that. I’ll do better next time.”

“You better.” She smiled up at him cheekily, then grabbed his hand, pulling him toward the stairs. Like every other time she led him anywhere, he followed happily.

 

The next day, James waited patiently for Lily to wake up so they could go get breakfast. Around eleven, she stumbled down the steps of her dorm, wrapped in light jeans and one of his old Gryffindor Quidditch kits, yawning hugely as she reached for his hand to start walking. She was humming to herself and rubbing the sleep from her eyes. He immediately felt those three words bubbling up on his lips, and he smiled as he pulled her close to him and whispered them in her ear. He was rewarded with a pleasant hum, warm, and a small smile at the corner of her mouth.

“Love you, too.” _As if it were nothing._

He smiled widely, heart leaping a little. He decided he was going to say it a million times a day only so that he can hear her say it back.

He told her so, and she pushed him a little, knocking their shoulders together. “Sap.”

“Romantic,” he corrected.

She hummed her assent. “My apologies, my love.”

James thought his smile would break his face. “My love.” He felt his face heat up, and pressed a hand to his cheek in a sad attempt to cool himself down. His heart beat quickly in his chest as he considered the words. _I love Lily Evans._


End file.
